There are many ways to identify as lesbian, from butches and femmes to studs and lipstick lesbians. The latter are femmes who love a glamorous, traditionally feminine style.
In 1994, low-definition footage from a Scouse soap opera caused a sensation when two female characters kissed. It was the first gay kiss many viewers had ever seen on TV.
The term “lipstick lesbian”
In the lesbian community, a “lipstick lesbian” is a woman who wears makeup and dresses in a feminine manner. She may also like wearing skirts or heels. This is considered a more glamorous, traditionally feminine style than a butch or femme woman.
Natalie McCray created the lipstick lesbian pride flag in 2010 to symbolize this sub-group. It is striped like the LGBT pride flag, with different shades of pink and red and features a red kiss. This version of the flag does not include butch lesbians, which caused some controversy.
Some people use the term negatively to describe a feminine lesbian who wants to pass as straight. This is not the case for all lipstick lesbians, though, and many simply enjoy dressing in a feminine way. It’s important to remember that there is no one-size-fits-all definition of a lipstick lesbian, so everyone should follow their own personal style. If you want to dress in a feminine manner, go ahead and do it!
The Lipstick Lesbian Flag
Designed by Natalie McCray in 2010, the lipstick lesbian flag is meant to represent the subgroup of women who self-identify as lipstick lesbians. It is striped like the rainbow pride flag, but instead of various hues it features tones of pink and purple with a lipstick print in the corner.
Although the flag has become one of the most recognizable lesbian pride symbols, it’s not without controversy. Many queer activists object to the fact that it only represents femme-presenting lesbians, excluding butch and non-femme lesbians.
A lipstick lesbian is a woman who exhibits greater traditionally feminine gender traits, such as wearing make-up or dresses and skirts. In contrast, a butch lesbian is a lesbian who promotes masculine traits through grooming or appearance. Regardless of their presentation, lipstick lesbians have a deep love for femininity and often use it to find a connection with others. This can be good and bad, as it may increase their appeal to cis men.
The First Lesbian Kiss
One of the first lesbian kisses to appear on TV was in a 1991 episode of L.A Law when bisexual lawyer C.J kissed her female colleague Abby Perkins on the lips. This episode was part of a sweeps week stunt (where shows try to draw in higher ratings for advertising) and it led to many calls to the NBC show from viewers, including some who wanted to yank their ads.
Unlike some TV shows of the time, this was not a storyline about two women becoming lovers, but a drama about two colleagues who are close friends. Nevertheless, it was the first time that a gay actress had kissed another woman on television, and it stirred up some controversy.
If she flirts with you, leans in closer when she talks to you, runs her hands through your hair or gets very touchy-feely, she is telling you that she likes other girls — which may mean that she’d be open to kissing you too.
The Second Lesbian Kiss
During the same episode of Yellowstone, a teen girl named Olivia and her friend Lara kiss each other. Their clinch is the first kiss between two girls on the show and it’s been hailed as a sign that the show has gone “woke.” But the truth is, the kiss is hardly a groundbreaking moment.
The girls are both white and middle class, they’re both smart and well-spoken and they go to a prestigious Inner London day school. They’ve both kissed boys before and will probably do so again.
This kiss is a small part of a much bigger story about gender identity on screen. For decades television has used a recurring trope called the lesbian kiss episode. In these episodes a heterosexual female character kisses a woman she might be interested in, but the potential relationship never goes any further. This has been a source of anger for sections of the LGBTQ community, who want to see better representation on screen.